The First Love Story
adapted by John Wayne Samples from an adaptation by Mark Twain

Subjects:

Synopsis:

Humorous and touching rendering of the story of Adam and Eve from creation to Eve's death.
From the perspective of their individual "diaries."

Purpose:

To put some contemporary issues about families and couples into a different context for evaluation and consideration.

2 Characters:

Adam: dressed in all white; barefoot.
Eve: dressed in all white; barefoot.

Staging:

Two stools with writing stands or two desks and chairs on opposite ends of platform.

Props:

Pens, clipboard, black sweaters/shawl, long-stemmed red rose, walking cane.

Notes:

Lights should alternate between the characters
as they talk.

Eve
I am almost a whole day old now. I arrived in this beautiful garden sometime yesterday, or at least that is how it seems to me. I am still trying to get used to all the animals. I particularly like the other creature that looks a lot like me -- only different. He's cute, but I don't think he knows I'm alive. Yet!

Adam
God was in an even better mood than usual today. I heard him talking about a new creation that was very, VERY good, but when I asked to see it, he told me I'd run across it soon enough. Then He sort of chuckled and said something about 1 + 1 = 1.

I hate math. Oh, well.
That new creature, the one that looks a lot like me -- only different, is a real pain in the side. It's always getting in the way. It seems to follow me around on purpose, even when I don't have any food to feed it.

I try to ignore it, but I keep getting this queasy feeling whenever it's around.

I don't know if I like this or not.

Eve
The most amazing thing happened today. That other creature that looks like me -- but different, it barked at me. It wasn't like the way a dog barks, it was words, kind of like the ones I enjoy using so much -- only different.

Like this!

I was so excited to hear it speak, I don't even remember what it said, but I do hope to hear its voice again, soon.

Adam
I finally told that new creature to "shut-up" today. You would have thought I had asked it to marry me or something, whatever that means. It just got all giggly and ran off. Well, at least it did run off.

However, I do have to admit something to myself... She sure is a lot more fun to look at than any of the other animals.

"SHE"? Where did I get that word?

God's lessons have been really interesting lately. He said that tomorrow I'll start learning about the little animals. He said its time we talked about the birds and the bees.

Oh! There's that queasy feeling again.

She must be around here somewhere...

Eve
I am exactly one month old today, and never before have a man and a woman been so blessed as Adam and I are. And I do mean never before!

God conducted the nicest little wedding ceremony down by the reflecting pool last week. I know it was a short engagement, but it's not like we needed to shop around or anything. Besides, when you got the right guy, you just know it!

I doubt that any couple will ever have it so good. But something tells me they might just think the very same thing.

Adam
I don't know whether to thank God or not! This EVE is nice enough, and she has been helping me do some things, at least I let her think she's helping. But, "till death do us part" is a mighty long time, I think.

I mean, I'm not sure how long this hunk of masculinity will last, but it just seems it might have been wise to wait a little longer to see if anything else, anything better would come along.

What's that...?

You only made how many like her...?!

Well, I always said she was one of a kind.

This is gonna work. With time. With the Lord's help. After all, we've only been married a year...

Eve
How long can it take this man to name these animals?! It's been over three years since God gave him this job, and it still isn't done! It's not like we're dealing with every animal in the world here...

Well, I guess it is every animal in the world. But still... I think he must need my help.

Adam
I got some more animals named today. Not that I really wanted to, but you-know-who thinks the Lord is gonna have a fit if I don't get it done. He never said that, I'm sure. At least not to me. Anyway, I don't know what the big hurry is, but we must be in one cause she decided to help me...

Eve   Standing and excited

I did not know I was so good at this.

Oh look, Adam, there goes a, uh, a dodo bird.

Adam   Reluctantly stands as both look out toward the audience.
There's no such thing as a dodo bird, Eve.

Eve
There is now. I just named it.

Adam
Why in the world would you give that poor animal a name like dodo bird?

Eve
It just looks like a dodo bird.

Adam
That ring-a-lang-a-thing-thing looks no more like a dodo than I do do.

...And so it went all afternoon. "It just looks like a this-or-a-that."

Well, no harm in letting her pretend, but we'll see whose names last longest.

Eve
That is not a zebra.

Adam
Eve, it is too! I should know, I named that one. You can always tell a zebra by those spots. Er, oh yeah.

Spots, stripes, horses, cats, what's the difference?

And if you're so smart, what's the name of that thing.

Eve
Oh, my. I've never seen anything like that before. Isn't it beautiful.

I think we should call this a... snake. No, serpent. That's classier sounding. Serpent. I like that.

ADAM! Did you hear that? This beautiful creature spoke to me. Said it likes the name I gave it. Said it likes me, too.

Adam
Great! The animals even like her names better.

She really seems to like that snake. By the way, I gave it that name last week. She knew it, too. That's why she changed it to serpent, I'm just sure.

I wonder why God didn't tell me snakes could talk?

Eve
I love my husband, but this serpent sure makes me feel good and I like to be around it. It told me today that I was by far the prettiest creature in the garden. And it said that there was a way I could be the smartest, too, if I'm not already.

Adam is finally motivated by something. I asked him today if he wanted to take a walk with me, but he said he had better go find some animals to name.

So I went on a walk with the serpent, instead.

I really would rather be with Adam. But I understand that he has responsibilities so I must be patient.

Adam
For the first time in years, I was without Eve for a while today. She asked me to take a walk with her, but I was so tired of hearing her talk about that stupid snake, I told her I had some work to do, and I left. I wonder how she spent her day.

I wonder if she missed me, too.

Eve
Cain and Able went fishing with their father today and they all left me to pick the beans. Little Anna helped out some, at least I let her think she did.

We had a bit of a scare just before lunch. Little Anna was down at the end of the row when she suddenly started screaming. I ran and grabbed her up just as this ugly, slimy looking snake made a strike at her. Before I realized what I was doing I was whacking at the beans with my rake trying to kill that thing. I ended up taking out 3 rows of beans, but I got the sneaky little devil. I just hate those awful creatures.

It's been 17 years since I last let a snake get the better of me. 17 years of blisters, and back aches, and sunburn. 17 years since I made that mistake that cost us so much. But, it could be worse. God kicked us out of the Garden, but he didn't leave us. And Adam didn't leave either. It could be a lot worse.

Adam
I lost my boys today. Able was killed in a dreadful accident, and Cain decided he needs to be on his own.

That's what I told their mother. She's been through so much raising those kids, I don't know if she can take the truth.

I've never longed for the Garden as much as I have today. There was no death, no pain, no fear of the future. Only the fellowship with God and being with the love of my life.

It's been half a lifetime since we made that awful mistake that costs us so much. Half a lifetime of boys bickering, fish hooks in the fingers, and "it's his turn to take out the trash".

But it could've been worse.

Eve
Adam became really sick today. I've not been this scared since the day we left the Garden. Please God, don't take him from me now.

Adam
Mercy. I don't know what that was that got a hold of me yesterday, but I've never felt so bad. Maybe I'm finding out just how long this hunk of masculinity will last.

At any rate, I reckon a fella oughta start slowing down when he reaches 900 years old. Of course, I thought that at 800, and 700, and 600....

Eve
I needed Adam to fix a fence today, and he gave me that same old line he used when he was 45, the one about needing to slow down at his age. I don't think I ever really minded when he said that, but today, I didn't even act like I did.

Thank you Father for bringing Adam back to me, if only for a while.

Lord, it is my prayer that when we die, we may pass from this life together. But if one of us must go first, it is my prayer that it shall be me. For he is strong, I am weak. I am not so necessary to him as he is to me.

You have blessed me to be the first wife. But in me you have planted the loves and desires and prayers that will be repeated in the last wife.

Adam
I love you Eve.

You know, I thought I had been put completely out of the Garden long ago, but only today do I learn that wherever you were, there was always Eden in my life.

By the way, God, did I ever thank you for her.